Small Magical Facts

Oh dear. I suppose I really ought to collect these somewhere instead of letting them wander about unsupervised. To summarize, I read something I really liked and decided to write some lore of my own. Enjoy.

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Stamps carried in the wallet will fly swiftly and return bearing money, but only when the book is folded stamp-side out. If the stamps are folded inward, the letter is likely to go missing. #SmallMagicalFacts

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Coffee has the ability to shift time. When it is hot, it borrows from the future. But as it cools, it begins to absorb from the past. The bitter flavor isn’t from coffee, it’s from your own life. #SmallMagicalFacts

PS: Cold Brew borrows from neither the past nor the future, but from a place outside time. Do not drink too much, there are things that hide in the dark areas where such liquors issue.

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Contrary to popular belief, the Hour of the Dead happens twice: 4 PM and 4 AM. The dead are always there, the only difference is that there are far less living beings to get in the way at night.

#SmallMagicalFacts

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Humans are the only species with a natural affinity for knots.

Strangely, humans themselves are almost universally unaware of their abilities, and will curse luck or fate or any number of imaginary malevolent forces for a tangled set of earbuds, or a seat belt that won’t unlatch, or a paramour who won’t take the fucking hint.

The last human knot-adept was Gordias of Phrygia, who’s works were historically reduced to a single act of vandalism. In recent times, humans have retaken the mantle and have made inroads into understanding their own abilities with the rather anachronistic phrase, “Mathematical Topology.”

(Author’s note: At the time of this writing, human libraries and colleges have made surprising developments in a field they’re choosing to call “Quantum entanglement.” They do not, however, appear to understand that they themselves are the cause of their own observations. The ability to compartmentalize their realms of study may be a natural side-effect of their untapped abilities. Certain unscrupulous academics have suggested Gifting a likely human and observing the results, but this publication could not possibly condone such a hasty and potentially dangerous undertaking. See related subjects: Tunguska, Tambora.)

#SmallMagicalFacts

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HOW TO SUMMON A BUS. (A spell.)

Nat Sherman Black Gold cigarettes. Remove from pack, tap 3 times then pause, then 3 times then pause, then 3 times again against your left hand. Turn widdershins from the road to 5 o’clock.

Intone, “These fucking things are always late” but do not look anyone in the eyes.

Light the cigarette, take a small drag, but do not smoke the rest of the cigarette.

Your bus will arrive before the coal extinguishes itself.

#SmallMagicalFacts